Alli Bo Bally

I know my blog is already full of unusual ramblings, but I decided to add to the collection after much contemplation. I figure, someday I won't be around to express my random thoughts! I enjoy writing it all out and there's something rather liberating about posting for the world to see (even though no one really reads my blog). I have the chance to write it all out right now...

I'm 21 years old...young and wild and free...No, Lil' Wayne, not that kind of fun. 

I'm free...free to WRITE MY OWN STORY...Right now is the pivotal time where life-altering decisions are made and rather than sit back and wait for something great to happen, wait for someone else to tell me what to do, I'm acting. I'm taking the pen and writing it out.

With all that in mind...it's a lot to take in. Like...a lot. I want to change the world.

Changing the world doesn't have to be a Mother Theresa moment. I don't need to be the next Gandhi or Heisenberg (note: breaking bad reference). Changing the world doesn't have to be some big act of angelic proportions. Changing the world is changing your attitude...

Gandhi took selfies too....

See, the truth is, the world is me and God. The second I accepted that, I changed the world...well, I changed my world at least.

Everyone and everything else doesn't really matter. People come and go and things are constantly changing but if you have a strong relationship with Him, you will never be disappointed. I really find myself extremely happy lately and satisfied with my life and the way I'm living it. I find myself happier with others as well. I strongly believe that happiness is not in the circumstance, but how we think and act on our trials. Our thoughts make up who we are, ultimately. Tweaking our thought process can change our lives...after all, life is not about the destination, but the "joy in the journey".

I guess in my 21 years of great knowledge and wisdom (much sarcasm intended) I've learned a few things in terms of happiness. I've learned that:

1) Being nice never looks bad.

You know that weird kid on the playground that everyone claimed had "cooties"? Do you remember the sinking feeling you had when you wanted to be nice but you were worried about what the other kids would say? The same applies now to the homeless man on the street or the girl at work who everyone dislikes. We worry that the people we interact with will reflect on how others view us. The truth is, the things we don't like about others are the very things we are insecure about in ourselves. Try to see the good in everyone...it's there, I promise.

2) Being bad never looks nice.

Wickedness never was happiness...haha but really. I'm talking about gossip. The way we treat others is more of a reflection on us than it is on them. What Sally says about Susie says more about Sally than it does about Susie...if you're picking up what I'm putting down...smellin' what I'm steppin' in? Don't try to camouflage your intentions and mask your ulterior motives. Your true colors will always shine through. Make them bright.

3) Hard is not relative...

Some hide it better than others, but the truth is, everyone is going through something incredibly hard. Whether your husband just passed away or you found out your mom has cancer...whether you're going through a horrible divorce, or you're struggling to find yourself in the middle of depression and anxiety...it doesn't matter. What matters is that we all need each other. We all need to face our trials head on with a positive attitude of gratitude. Charity never faileth...

4) Have purpose and work hard

One of the many keys to happiness, in my opinion, is having purpose. Purpose is different for everyone. Every person in this world has something that no one else can contribute. That is truth. Read this Sheri Dew talk for further explanation. I have an incredible friend who felt prompted to call me last night out of the blue. Perfect timing. She may have not done anything else all day, but she made a huge difference in my life. We all have purpose, now find yours.

5) Be okay with messing up

Making mistakes is part of the process of life. Get back up and move on. You'll never be past the point of correction in this life. The more we mess up and adapt, the better off we are. I think that is why most older people are so happy. They aren't just complacent and apathetic. They have gotten past the fear of not being perfect. 

6) Allow yourself to be teachable

Yes, this means that you don't know everything. What if the doctors of the law passed by this small boy in the temple in Jerusalem? What if they would have said “We are learned men and we need not be taught by a boy! What does a boy know that we haven’t studied?” Well, if they did that, they would have passed up the opportunity of a lifetime. The young boy just happened to be the Son of God and the Messiah that they had waited for generations to find. We may pass someone by because of their age or education or social status who otherwise could have taught us something that could have changed our lives. Open up your mind.

7) Creativity should never be withheld

"The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before. Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty. Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty… remember that you are spirit (children) of the most creative Being in the universe.”...'nuff said.

8) Trials make us stronger

Cliche, yes? I believe it. When I was younger I would play on my grandparents land and had many adventures. One time I came upon a tiny robin's egg. I decided to become a mother and keep it safe until it hatched into a cute little chick. I waited and waited for it to hatch and one day it started breaking open it's shell. Immediately I could not contain my excitement and I helped it crack open the shell the rest of the way. Although my intentions were good, by cracking it's shell, I was preventing the chick from struggling and gaining the strength it needed to survive. I was heartbroken. I remember looking back at that experience and being able to relate it to how God feels for each of us. He watches us struggle and stumble every day. It would be so easy for him to reach His almighty hand down and solve our problems, but he knows that allowing us to struggle will only contribute to our growth progression. That experience really helped me look at trials in a whole new light and I'll never forget it. Whenever I'm going through a tough time, I always just try to remember that little chick in it's shell and how the longer it struggled, the stronger it got.

9) Let Him define you

If you're friends with me, you've heard me say this plenty of times. Let other people think what they think...but never let them define you. Allow yourself to become completely defined by Christ...the one who actually knows you inside and out. You'll be a lot happier that way.

10) Attitude of gratitude and living in the present.

"God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him". Really, kids. This is the way to be. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why we call it present" That was my favorite quote growing up!

11) Take responsibility and move forward

Live a life of responsibility, not a life of excuses. We are literally the creators of our circumstances, not the creatures carried by circumstance. There is only one person responsible for the quality of life that you are living: YOU. If you want to be happy, you have to take 100% responsibility for everything that you experience in your life. Too many people blame others for their circumstances. They blame their parents, their bosses, their friends, the media, their coworkers, their clients, their spouse (or ex-spouse), the weather, the economy, their lack of money, etc. They never quite see where the real barrier to their happiness is: Themselves. Until you take responsibility for your life (both the good and the bad), there will always be something lingering inside of you holding you back. You will not truly be free. Freedom involves responsibility.

12) Let things be as they are

This means giving up the need to control everything around you...  This doesn't mean giving up, but simply allowing things to be as they are and not needing to control it...not investing your energy and emotion into something that isn't worth your time. Let Go(d). Whether they're loved ones, coworkers, or strangers...just let them be! Maybe you are in a rut and you have no control over the situation, let it happen. You will feel better by doing this and handing it over to the higher power.

13) "Pride is concerned with WHO is right, Humility is concerned with WHAT is right."

There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”  What difference will that make?

14) Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so completely frightening. You have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life...now. After all, life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now. We all have thoughts, emotions and physical sensations. The more awareness we have, the more able we will be to step outside of our situation. We can then look at it without feeling out of control or victimized by the situation. 

Whoever you are, please remember to be good to yourself.

Until next time my friends...